Home > Life, Success > How to become a social magnet. How to be popular. How to improve your soft skills.

How to become a social magnet. How to be popular. How to improve your soft skills.


Have good listening skills

A human has two ears and one mouth, our listening must be more than our talking. Listening does not mean to wait impatiently for the other person to finish so we could talk, true listening is when we understand precisely what is being said without interrupting. If you can do that, I give you a thumbs up because you are a special person with good social skills.

See the good in people

Seeing the good in people is not an easy task, it requires sincerity, open-mindedness, tolerance, and an understanding of the causes of one’s own thoughts. Prejudice is a tyrant, so if you can slit the throat of prejudice then you surely can see the good in people instead of being a scavenger and feeding off their weaknesses.

Be sincere

Sincerity is the toughest and the most rewarding social skill, because like attracts like, if you truly and sincerely care for the welfare of the other person whom you are interacting with, s/he will inevitably have a liking towards you. You can not sincerely see the good in people without seeing the good in yourself, the law of cause and effect, to do something on the outside it has to be done in the inside first, if you constantly insult others with foul language, that means you are insulting yourself silently with foul language (when you speak to yourself in your mind), did you ever ask why people say “respect yourself” ? that’s because a person who does not respect people does not respect himself (notice the way you talk to yourself in your mind) You will rarely feed a pet if you are starving, so you should feed yourself first with respect and sincerity consequently you will be able to feed others. (first inwards then outwards)

Be consistent

People are attracted to those who are consistent in their actions, if you say hello to a person one day and the other day you don’t, you are more likely to be distant from that person. A real life e.g: one day I went to the grocery store, I got used to greeting the owner of the store who works there and apparently he got used to it too. This one time I was in a hurry so I rushed inside his store and headed towards the refrigerators without even looking at his side. After I picked up my items and I approached him to pay, he looked at me angrily and he spoke to me in an aggressive tone and he shook my hand and was greeting me, as if he was saying “why didn’t you greet me today?”

I figured out it really does matter to give attention to people, it matters to them. Everyone craves for attention.

Being consistent means to avoid mood swings as well; one day you are happy joking and laughing with every one, the next day you are completely the opposite.

Have confidence

People are attracted to others who have unshakable confidence. (not the fake weary confidence that can easily be spotted)

Confidence comes from a person’s understanding of  his own self.

Do not argue for the sake of arguing

Arguing is a mental battle, would you go and have a fist fight with your friend everyday? I’m sure you wont, then how come you don’t mind having a mental battle? In my opinion; psychological trauma is worse than physical trauma. Just as a physical wound might injure the skin and leave a scar, even arguments can inflict psychological scars which can hardly be healed. So it’s better to avoid an argument whenever you feel that it is about to begin.

Control your anger

Anger is a way of expressing your refusal for a circumstance. Remember that getting angry is all in your head. people enjoy the company of those who make them laugh and happy, but they do not enjoy the company of angry people, no angry boss ever succeeds, no angry teacher ever is listened to by his/her students, no angry parent ever is loved by his/her children.

Einstein says: “Anger only dwells in the bosom of fools”

It is absolutely natural to become angry, Anger and fear are nature’s way of helping us stay alive, in the face of danger you fight or flee. But to become angry too often is not good for your physical and social health.

Be positive

Expect the best out of your circumstances, be positive, have a positive attitude, people tend to avoid those who complain and whine too much, and accompany those who are positive and expect the best out of life. Avoid being negative.

Categories: Life, Success
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